specially for you

i ll wait

until the day

hope it wont be too late

remember

i ll keep all my promises

and hold my words

hold your tears please

cause i dun wanna to see you cry

you are the one i appreciated lots

my shoulder is always for u

whenever u feel sad or tension

dun ever forget

u still got me....=)

hug momo when i din beside u
i ll hug dai dai too
nitez

我的期待

很失望

我还是没有收到你的任何简讯

你真的决定了

还是 你只想静一静

或者是 你在等着我的答复

我错过了

对不起 真的对不起

我真的希望 也很期待

一觉醒来 可以看到你的简讯

知道你还是关心着我的......

i m waiting....
just wait for ur one msg...

i miss u lots....
i really do....

28042009

睡了一觉 心情确实平复了许多
只有睡觉 才能让我暂时放下一切
原来我是带着泪水睡着的
难怪醒来后眼睛有点肿

发怒果然会让人失去理智
很庆幸我睡着了
要不我不懂我又会怎么样了
原来我还没忘掉那不开心的回忆
事情都过了一年多
我只向一个人提起过
当时我只想找人发泄 了解一下我的心情
因为我一个人真的承受不了那么多

每每想起
我的眼泪还是禁不住流出来
我还是很难过
为什么我无法释怀
为什么我不能当一切都没发生过
为什么???

HATE!!!!

I HATE EVERYTHING IN THIS WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I HATE STAYING HERE!!!!!!!!!

I WANNA LEAVE HERE!!!!!!!!!

WHY WANNA MAKE ME CRY???????????

WHY WANNA BULLY ME?????????

WHY????????WHY?????????

i need exercise!!

i really have to on diet this time...
not only on diet...but exercise too!!

i went sunshine yesterday..
and i had made a body fat screening...
it cost me RM3..
quite worth la...
first...i filled up my personal data..
then the people in charged took me to do measurement..
i stepped up n stood on the machine...
then pull one part of it....(lol...dunno how to explain)
the digits of my body weight appeared in few seconds....
oh oh...OMG....
i gained my weight!!!
it is XXkg now!!!wth!!

after that,the people who in charged explained to me...
lol...my bio-age is 23 years old...
it is older than my actual age..=.=
another things which shocked me alot was:
my body fat considered as slightly high...
oh oh...30.4% of my actual weight...lol...=.=
the ppl asked me to some exercise to reduce my body fat...
build those fats into muscles...lol..

just wanna share something here...
*loss weight doesnt mean loss fat
*weight = bone + water + muscle + fat
*skeletal muscle decreases = metabolic rate decreases
*slim down = reduce body fat, build muscle n increase metabolism

thus...i really have to do more exercise...
to reduce my body fat..
and build skeletal muscle...lol...=.=
hope i can carry out my plan this time...xD

27042009

忙碌的日子又开始了
刚从jonathan家回来
他妈妈还请我吃巧克力布丁
刚吃完饭 想上来这里留些字.....

昨晚九点钟就上床睡了
身体累 心也累
我很少有把手机关掉的习惯
可是 我昨晚关机了
睡着睡着
不懂什么时候我醒了过来
看看时钟
原来才十二点多
想起我那关机的电话
爬起来摸索然后打开它
有个简讯 也是唯一的简讯
来不及了 太迟了
我真的很累 我已经没有多余的力气
我还是睡着了....

今早醒来
我再也没有收到任何简讯
我应该明白了 也应该懂了...

你决定了吗?
你真的决定了吗???

nitez

i m down now...emo-ing...

i wanna go to sleep ad...

hope i ll be okay after sleep...

promise myself n yourself...

no tears anymore...

only with dai dai n momo...

nitez..

笨?单纯?

我觉得自己很矛盾
也很可笑
相信人与否就只在一线之间
对于信任的人
我往往給予100%的信任
我曾说过
我的信任不会随随便便就把送人
可惜
有时候的我还是很天真
很容易上当
是该说我笨呢 还是单纯
选择前者就太侮辱我的智商了吧
还是选择后者吧 哈哈^^
是我没好好好认识人类邪恶的一面
还是说 在感情上我的自我保护意识较强
who knows?

无聊之作

有时候会问自己：人的命运是自己掌控的吗
偶尔我会质疑这句话的真实性
为什么有些人就能过着“饭来张口，衣来伸手”的生活
而有些人劳累了大半辈子
却只剩下疲惫的身躯和憔悴的容貌
人不是应该平等的吗
可是同样是人类的我们却有着不同的命运
有些人注定一生可以享受荣华富贵
有些人却一生拼命挣钱过生活

对我来说
如果那个人是白手起家
我会对他敬佩不已
不过如果是靠着家族的财富
我只可以说他命好

出来工作也有段时间了
我确实体会了很多
虽然没有职场政治
也没有职场风波
不过些许的压力是有的
钱 真的不容易赚
都是用劳力与精神换来的

有个朋友问：你很缺钱吗?干嘛打酱多份工?
问这问题的朋友
和明显的和我不是同道中人
我也懒得解释些什么
同人不同命
试问从小娇生惯养的人
备受溺爱的人
可以了解吗

我并非似钱如命
我只想靠我的双手赚钱
靠我双手养活自己
都快踏入第二十个年头了
难道还靠父母吗?
我还是喜欢靠自己

钱
虽然不是万能的
可是它常常使得鬼推磨
如果这世上的每一样东西不是靠金钱来衡量
那该有多好
然而
这只是我异想天开的想法
有些人为了钱出卖感情
甚至出卖肉体
钱啊
终究让人变得更邪恶

insomnia

insomnia.....

i hate this...
couldnt sleep...

and now...
i need somebody to talk v me so badly....
i need somebody to care me so badly....
i need somebody to sayang me so badly....
lol
emo now....T.T

装傻

常常我就会装傻
为的就是逃避问题
我不懂我这样做对不对
我只想保留美好的一面
好让大家可以下台

看了她的部落格
我其实不懂要给些什么反应
就当着若无其事
就在装傻
这样 究竟对吗
我不懂
真的不懂

她也没向我说些什么
希望她在她的世界可以活得更快乐 更幸福
我承认
我也会有心软的时候
可是 这样好吗?

mY nEw laptOp

finally i have time on here...
n i m blogging using my new laptop...^^
hp pavilion...
i done lots of survey...
asked my fren who work as technician..
surfed da websites...
i even went to pc fair twice...
when i considered hp pavilion
i was a little bit worried..
because da screen only 12"
and i actually felt that quite small...
by da way...it is light n fulfill most of my conditions...
except da screen...
at last...i made my decision..
my dad asked his fren to reserve one for me..
now..
i m already get used of da screen..
it is actually not too bad..
n i can bring it to anywhere...
hmm...great!!xD

下雨天

在雨天听这首歌超有感觉的....

下雨天了怎么办 我好想你
不敢打给你 我找不到原因
为什么失眠的声音
变得好熟悉
沉默的场景 做你的待定
陪我等雨停
期待让人越来越沉溺
谁和我一样
等不到他的谁
爱上你我总在学会
寂寞的滋味
一个人撑伞 一个人擦泪
一个人好累
怎样的雨 怎样的夜
怎样的我能让你更想念
雨要多大
天要多黑 才能够有你的体贴
其实没有我你分不出那些差别
结局还能多明显
别说你会难过
别说你想改变
被爱的人不用道歉
寂寞让人越来越疲惫
谁和我一样
等不到他的谁
爱上你我总在学会
寂寞的滋味
一个人撑伞 一个人擦泪
一个人好累
怎样的雨 怎样的夜
怎样的我能让你更想念
雨要多大
天要多黑 才能够有你的体贴
其实没有我你分不出那些差别
结局还能多明显
别说你会难过
别说你想改变
被爱的人不用道歉
怎样的雨 怎样的夜
怎样的我能让你更想念
雨要多大
天要多黑 才能够有你的体贴
其实没有我你分不出那些差别
结局还能多明显
别说你会难过
别说你想改变
被爱的人不用道歉

her homemade sushi^^

this evening i actually had my English class...
but at last i decided to accompany her to library...
know what??
she said wanna treat me eat sushi..
haha...xD
i was so excited...xD
as a result, i canceled my class...
phoned her n confirmed v her again...
then went to fetch her immediately...
waiting for my sushi so badly...^^

in car...i asked her again...
below is our conversation...(in mandarin)
me: eh,u really wanna treat me eat sushi ar?
her: yala...i kena lottery mer...got money ad...
me: really eh ma? how come kena lottery?so good?
her: hmm...dun care where i get da money la...treat u eat toh tiok liao...
me: ok ok...so v going qb har？
her: hmm...

i was actually very hungry...
so i was happy to hear that...
then i took another road to qb to avoid traffic jam..
suddenly....guess..what's happened?
she took out a small, white tupperwear...
lol...homemade sushi...cheh...
thought going sushi king...
okay lo...let me took so long long way but not going to qb..
i was disappointed...=/
n pretended angry...haha...
her homemade sushi was delicious perhaps...
i ate all in car...lol...
tam chiak lo me...xD
as a punishment to her..
i asked her to send me sushi next time...^^

miss ur sushi so much...
even u...
it is raining now...
hope u cover ur blanket
n dun get cold ya..^^

给你的话

你告诉我
有人取代了你在我心目中的地位
我变得愈来愈不懂你的感受
不晓得你要些什么
你说 你再也容不进我的世界
我开始变得很陌生

我想让你知道
一直以来 你在我心目中的份量我比谁都懂
或许你开始迷惑了
你也失去你原本拥有的信心
有时候我是真的不懂你要些什么
我承认 我也很固执

想想
好久好久没和你好好说话了
我很enjoy和你互聊心事的时候
我们无所不谈
我有时候是迟钝了些
不懂得你要表达些什么
我也不是要把我的世界给封闭起来
我也希望得到关怀

你说过
假如一天你迷失了自己
你希望我把你带回来
牵着你一起走下去
我从来都没有忘记你说的
即使你曾经是怎么迷失了自己
我不是原谅了你
把你给带回来吗?

刚刚
以往的回忆又浮现在我脑海里
曾经是多么熟悉的地方
我再次踏入
给了我很多了感触
我发现
我还是很珍惜...

你曾说过
就算朋友再多 也无法了解你心里的寂寞
你说我是最了解你的那一位
我想问
现在还是吗?

trust me
although the life is tough and challenging
i will never forget what i have promise you
hope you sleep well tonight
may God bless you...
take care & hugs...^^

19042009

我病了
而且是患上感冒和伤风
讨厌 =/

昨天
我遇到了个野蛮人
他是pcfair的security
当时我正在值班
看见他捄这一位学生的衣服
还直骂那学生bodoh
我都傻了眼
至于发生什么事
我也懒得写了
只觉得
怎么会有酱蛮不讲理的人

是你没把你的本份做好
还来怪人
你有没有问题
我和他吵了起来

you are the one who should be responsible...
not us...
the outsiders come in through here not my business..
i m just a clerk here..
how come you ask me do your job...
you should block those outsiders come in from here...
not me...
i m not security guard...
but is you!!
and you should not scold the boy...
he dunno anything...

现在想起
我还是会气
很无奈
那时候他还想出手打那位学生
最后我把bk keng 给叫了出来
连bk keng 这位好好老师都忍不住发火

怎么这世上就有酱蛮横的人呢
唉.....

18042009

guess...why m i still awake?lol...
not insomia...
but just woke up from sleep...xD
damn tired whole day....
thought saturday i would have more free time...
but nope!!
i went for munsyi test at usm this morning...
n i nearly late..v chee hong..
because he took da wrong way at first...haha
310 question in one hour...
it's just like omg....
my hand keep working n working...

afternoon...
i had my tuition class for jonathan n chee ying...
until 6.30pm...half day passed...phew..
after that..i attended a birthday party for my neighbour's baby...
hmm...he is cute by da way....^^
the conclusion for this party was:i gain my weight again!!!=/
due to the tiredness...i broke my record....haha
i went sleep at 9pm...wow....unbelievable rite?

and i got a news which disappointed me alot in da late afternoon..
penang prefects' footdrill competition 2009...
peng hwa got 4th for basic..3rd for formation....
i really wondered why they got such result...
mayb i shouldnt say much...
but i had participate this competition before...
we put much effort on it...
n...we got 1st n 2nd for basic...
1st for formation n overall champion...
seniors keep maintain da trophy...
but u all lost it...really disappointed le...
from joining prefects board until last year...
i actually felt that our marching is da best....
i proud of our prefects' marching...
but now...i change my mind....
it's not da best anymore...
it replaced by chungling,union n etc...
speechless....=/

i m dilemma-ing by da way...
going to buy laptop soon...
but having difficulties choosing a good laptop
lol...pc fair ll b finish 2ml...
i still cant make a decision yet...
hp?toshiba?asus?
i need help!!!

i missed my modeling audition today...=/
i will b participating next season...
trust me..i ll go for it...=)

发泄

今晚又处于“不正常”的状态 =/
怎么最近的我酱反常?

拜托一下好不好
既然事情都已经发生了
都已经是事实了
还能弥补些什么呢
我最多也只上一次当
难不成还会被同样的事情被骗第二次吗
就当我买个教训
怎么就是有诸多意见

够了
真的够了
我也受够了

我只想拥有一天的好心情
有酱困难吗

怀念我的笑容
最近都被偷走了
我不想变个冷漠无情的人

饶了我，好吗?

seriously

i m missing you right now
do you know
i guess u dont know

终于....

终于
我的心情平复了
有时候我的脾气很怪 也很坏
不是很多人都忍受得了
就连我自己有时候也受不了

他曾说
他可以忍受
是酱的吗?

还好
我又变回正常了 =)

发牢骚

又上来这里发牢骚了
这不能全都怪我
有些事情和人把我给惹了
况且这是我的部落格
我爱写什么 爱埋怨什么
都不干任何人的事
我只是想抒发我的情绪而已

人 往往心中都藏着些不满吧
说出来 可能会伤了和气
不说 自己又没办法承受
很矛盾对吧
这世上有太多矛盾的事情了
数都数不清
常觉得这世界欠缺公平
为什么人往往会受到不公平的待遇
还是我太悲观了呢?

有时候你会被假象包围着
而你身在其中
却什么也感受不到
对于那些美丽的谎言
你又怎么看待呢?

我讨厌受到不公平的对待
也不喜欢别人对我的所作所为有任何意见
更不喜欢受到任何束缚
我不说
不表示我认同
我不是我行我素
只是我有自己的立场
只要我认为是对的
我都会去做
有时候的我是固执的
我不否认

我是我
在这世上独一无二的我
我想做些什么是我的自由
只要我没触犯任何法律就好啦
我知道我的生活该怎么过
我若错了 我会改
我不需要任何质疑的眼光

should i give it a try??

should i give it a try??

i m still thinking....

i need some time to think about it...

actually i dont have much confidence...

seriously..i m thinking now....


18 of april...

should i go?

modeling contest at gurney plaza

02042009

nothing special today...
but still wanna write something here...

i m bored perhaps....
can anyone just talk to me??lolx...

life passes everyday...
and yet...
my life seems like meaningless...
just full of working...
working working n working...
n i m tired...

suddenly miss my school life so much....
my beloved frens...teachers...
and also U6SE!!!
but surely not peng hwa n three of them....lolx...
i wish the time could flow backwards...

i miss my school life lots!!!

midnight post

April Fool finally passed...

Looking backwards...
when we were small...
we tried to fool each other on this day...
so..same for the kids nowadays...
I got fooled by them!!lolx..
hmmpp...those gals really naughty...xD

again...with my 'sexy' voice....
scolded them nonstop....
peace for few seconds....
then bec to normal again...lolx..
n with their very 'nice' writting..
i suffered one more time....T.T

finally...
i got my march payment...
aikz....damn little...
no allowance...T.T
cause i din work for full month...

i went cheng beng at sg petani this morning...
with my dad...only two of us...
the weather damn hot...
sweat trickled down all the time..
n now my skin become darker ad...

n now...
somebody is waiting i finish blogging...
i wonder y he so interested to my blog...lolx...
he said he wanna read my mind..hehe
hey man...
u thought u can simply catch what i m thinking...haha
if u can do it...then i m not hy ad..lolx...

p/s: just kidding...dun take it serious k?

that's the ending for this post...
wanna sleep with dai dai ad...
nitez again everyone...^^

010409~April Fool

WOW...unbelievable...
i m still awake...xD
thought i ll be sleep all night long...

later have to follow my dad go 'cheng beng' somemore..
at sungai petani...so far..lol...
i just slept for 2 hours after i came bec from work...
and now...i m energetic..hahax..

it was a tiring day...
those kids really make me frustrated...T.T
i wonder why they cant listen to me...
have to cane them somemore....lol...
and i was getting moody once i felt sleepy...
my sisters already get used to my weird temper..
they wont b kacauing me while i m in bad mood...lol...
cause i ll b scolding them like a mad person..

unfortunately...i din get my salary yet..
i want to go for shopping so badly...=)

01 April~April Fool
hope that i wont b fooled by those kids...
or else....they ll be kena la...hahaha..
i wont let them bully me so easily...lolx...
Patrick...dun try to trick me ya..^^

hmm...that's all for this post...
wanna go to bed d...
nitez everyone...