28112009

回来槟城
并没有让我有温馨的感觉
人家常常说 home sweet home
可我一点儿也感觉不到

我闷得发慌
除了睡觉 醒来 吃 喝 工作 上网 看戏
我不懂我还能做些什么
我讨厌过这种生活
顿时间很讨厌假期
现在的我宁愿天天都在上课

这个假期我好像颓废似的
开始怀念大学生活了
虽然一开始对任何的人和事物都很陌生
可是渐渐的 我适应了
这就是我 总是有超强的适应力
我建立起和系友之间的友谊
虽然大家来自不同的州属
但是都相处得非常融洽
我喜欢和他们一起说笑 一起玩乐

我究竟什么时候才能拥有我想得到的自由
我想离开这个家
我不想呆在这个家
这样说 很可笑吧?

13112009

明天早上 我又得独自一个人到KL去
五个小时的车程 自个儿的
真的有点孤单
还好 我已经把mp3的电池充得满满的
酱才不至于无所事事

都是那该死的培训营
算了 是自己决定的
这还能怪谁呢
希望接下来的几天我能够平平安安地渡过
一切都不要太辛苦咯 =)

话说回来
我的laptop又故障了 又拿去修理了
莫非就如ed所说的
我这主人对它不好吗?
刚刚更新了windows 7 而已嘛
很疑惑...0.0
宝贝 你就被闹脾气了
等你休完假回来我再好好疼你咯 哈哈~

眼睡了 是时候休息咯~
晚安 ^^

我哭了...

我还是忍不住哭了~

不能说的秘密 II

曾经写了这么一篇"不能说的秘密"
大约是一年前的事了
如今 这个标题再次浮现
不过我猜想这应该是最后一次了

秘密~本来就是不该说出来的事情
加上了"不能说"这三个字
就更加应该藏在心里深处 不是吗?
所以我一直坚守自己的立场
一字都不透露
以前 我总是把它隐藏起来
而现在 是时候把这个秘密埋葬起来了
因为 秘密里的主角都已经死了
说出来也没啥意义了
故事的情节也该告一段落

这故事会很伤感
会令人很难过
甚至会落泪
然而 这样的结局是可以预料到的
只是不晓得它降临得这么快
所以 主角她不强求
只希望她会变得更坚强
在未来的日子里过得更加美丽 更有色彩

"不要轻言放弃,否则对不起自己"
加油!
她深信爱她的人会出现
她一定会很幸福.....

溜冰记~02112009

终于尝试了我一直以来都不敢尝试的~溜冰
害怕出丑 总是不敢踏出第一步
既然这次朋友约了 我也就豁出去了

第一次溜冰难免会出糗
庆幸的是 我有两个很好的教练~ed 和 cat
我才不至于伤痕累累
虽然脚被磨损了一些 不过这也是在所难免的

我就像刚学走路的婴儿
站得不稳 随时都有倒下的可能
还好cat一直扶着我
我总算学会了如何滑出第一步
刚开始时 我握着cat和扶住旁边的围墙
一步一步地滑着 慢慢地 我也滑了好几圈
之后我开始上手了 开始溜得比较快 也跌了好几次
不过就没像zhi seng酱严重咯 ^^

那里有几个小孩子也在溜冰
看着他们溜冰的样子真的很可爱 xD
即使是跌倒了 滑倒了 他们还"咯咯"笑个不停
好多都是溜冰爱好者
看着他们溜得很专业的样子 我好羡慕

溜了几个小时
脚酸了 也磨损了 我也没有力气再继续了
晚餐地点~pasar malam
买了晚餐 大伙儿回到k6享用
期待下一次溜冰哦
也希望下一次更多人会去 =)

31102009

昨晚啃书啃到四点
还是啃不完
已经是硬着头皮撑着眼皮把每个字给读过
真的有股冲动想把书烧了当符水喝
果然是个 "平时不烧香, 临时抱佛脚" 的"榜样"
还真的有少许的后悔呢
在图书馆打left for dead
还发生了件糗事
在图书馆的每一位都对我投来异样的眼光
好糗噢~

最近还蛮有口福的
昨晚到了新的大排档吃东西
吃了好多东西
原来 ABC = 红豆冰
又增肥了....
看来我的瘦身计划又泡汤了 T.T

终于都考完human这张paper
能不能够拿个A回来就真的要靠运气了
哈哈~
roommate接下来这几天都不在
要自己一个人睡咯 ^^

30102009

on duty now...
yeah~
most suffering day finally passed...
physiology & demo test in one day...
really kill me man!
hopefully i won score too bad for my physio...
i tried my best..
the rest just left for fate...

2 more papers left..
human development & oral
then i ll be free ad~haha xD
gambatek everyone~

24102009~火警演习

深夜二时许
我的桌灯还亮着
还坐着啃书
有点睏
但还是努力撑着....

突然
“啪” 的一声
四周漆黑一片
我自言：shit! 又停电!
同房的也苏醒了
接着
火警铃声响了起来
我不以为然
以为又失灵了
直到听见：api! api!
我才意识到是火灾...

同房的舒依很慌张
跳了起来电话没拿就直冲出去
我叫住她
不慌不忙地拿了电话，符和钥匙
然后把门上了锁
才跑下楼去

当时我穿着背心和超短的裤子
竟然连laptop都没拿
真的好潇洒
过后才想起
才来担心不懂会不会被烧
下了楼
看到delima在冒烟
还以为delima那里被烧了
过后才知道虚惊一场...=/
原来只是火警演习

找死啊!
半夜三更玩这样的把戏
好几个马来婆都被吓晕了
穿得如此"性感"的我有点尴尬
四周都是那些马来人
没法子
如果是真的火灾哪来酱多时间管呢
不少人都埋怨
因为都睡着了
况且隔天又有课外活动
不累才怪

结束后
我继续啃我的书
直到四时许才爬上床睡觉

这次的火警果然是k6 "历史性" 的一刻
希望在未来的四年里我可以平平安安地渡过~

20102009

time: 0700
venue: bathroom, keranji 241, 6th college
reason: bathe & take my breakfast

time: 0830
venue: on bus
reason: waiting bus to move & go to library
(in fact, i was very sleepy cause stayed up late last9)

time: 0900
venue: Perpustakaan Sultan Abdul Samad, Blok B
reason: study for FINAL examination
(accompanied by my dear room mate)^^

now...i m in the library...
finally finish one chapter of the damn stupid TITAS
really can kill my brain cells...
guess why?
because the sentences are damn stupid long and hard to understand...
i have to read it few times sometimes...
moreover, i hate those islam things...
it already considered not bad if i can stay here and study...hehe..

unlike my room mate...
she is super geng neh...
studying nonstop from just now...
pei fu pei fu...
the air-conditioner here very cold...
hope i can stand until evening...
have to bec to my TITAS book already...
ciao~=)

17102009

tired~
the connection in college really sucks...
i wanna send assignment to my leader la~~
S-T-U-P-I-D
okie..forget bout it...
lets flashback to yesterday...
went jusco balakong with my coursemates..
of course, ed was the driver...
then other two rare species in my course...
jia jia & zhi seng...
we reached there about 1pm..
and thought that we can sing without booking...lol
we were wrong!!
the receptionist informed that only got room at 4pm...
omg...
so..we planned to take our lunch first...
haha...=)
After having our lunch at old town,
our BONDING SESSION started...^^
4 of us talked n laughed alot...
i noticed that some ppl stared at us...lol...

we left when it was almost 4pm...
again...
i was the one holding the mic all the time...xD
习惯就好...
4 hours singing really can kill our throat...
ate fillet-o-fish as my dinner....
fall asleep after reaching hostel...
overall, it was a tiring and enjoyable day....

16102009

again in demo class..
but i m on9-ing...hehe
beside me is ed...
guess what does he do now?
playing left 4 dead..
so enjoyable...
this morning almost everyone late for demo class...
me, jia jia, lulu, ed n bong...
we tumpang ed's car to FEM..haha
then met zhi seng n wayne...
they were late too..haha...
later going to sing k again...
so excited man..la~la~
at least can release my stress...=)

14102009

final exam is around the corner...
start from 26th of oct til 5th of nov...
at first i thought i can go bec home early...
but yet...
i ll be attending the pewaris camp if i got selected...
just because want to get a place to stay college...
anyway, i heard that the camp quite fun & interesting from seniors...
hopefully i ll be selected~
joining as usher for next year pesta angpau upm...
waiting for it to come...
cause i know i ll learn lots of new things though i lack of experiences...
n i know it is not an easy job...

love yoga from day to day...
after sweating i really feel very comfortable n got released...
of course, i ll continue to join it for the coming semesters...
not only healthy but also beauty...xD

somehow...
i start to dislike one of my coursemates...
she is a sociable person...
but she cant give commitment n contribution either in assignment or any activities...
kept complaining all the time...
when everyone is busy doing their own work,
she ll sit aside n talk to the phone...
she just think of herself...
went pretty nervous n care bout things related to her only...
but not us...aikz...

skipping demo class now...haha..
cause there is no point to attend the class as there is presentation...
thinking what to eat for my brunch...=)
hope that today go smoothly as usual...^^

12102009

not in a comfortable mood these few days...
small things happened then accumulated...
it turns out my mood get affected...
S-T-U-P-I-D
this word keep come out from my mouth recently...
woke up for physio class this morning...
but the lecturer din appear...
not 1st time ad...
stupid...
my physio 2nd test really sucks...
i din really study...
so i din put much hope on the result ad...
n pls...
when i not in good mood...
dun come n disturb me...
dun come n ask me this n that...
obviously i hate all these...
just leave me alone...
that's what i want...

keep ur mouth SHUT pls!

积点口福吧
嘴巴生来不是用来唱衰别人的
况且你根本没有资格批评人
也别讲一套做一套
我们都厌倦了你的作风
所以....
keep your mouth shut pls!!!

05102009

woke up at 7am this morning...
just wanted to do the stupid registeration...
unfortunately...it could'nt work like last9...
kept showing me "pendaftaraan kursus tidak dibenarkan"..
lousy system...
sigh...=/
really hate the mosquitoes in upm..
especially at balai ilmu k6...
i hate it man!!

02102009

my human development 2nd test is over...
but still got physiology on next thurs...
hopefully i manage to cope all the chapters...
sigh...a lot to read neh...

tomorrow ll be a busy day again...
koku in the morning...
usher interview at the afternoon...
then continue v my assignments again~~
but i m waiting for this sunday to come...
cause i ll be going to cheras for yoga..
yeah...xD

finally can sleep earlier tonight...
i have been stay up until very late this few days...
nitez everyone...

01102009

exhausted!!
skip my classes n lab...
just to do my demography assignment..
my laptop has been on for 11 hours...
i m super tired now...=/
haven study for my test for tomorrow yet...
haiz.........
God...
give me some strengths n energy....
i need it so much now........

hectic week!! =/

my nightmares started after i came bec from penang...
i was spending a week of time to enjoy and relax...
is time to face the reality~ASSIGNMENTS!!
fortunately i have just finished one of them...wee..=)
yet i still have few to do during this week...
n my 2nd test is on this friday man...
have to burn midnight oil this whole week...
so wish to go sing K again..hehe..

bec to this morning...
i was late to lecture...
when i almost reach the classroom, i met my coursemate...
she told me that our lecturer was angry n left the classroom...
cause all of us didn't wear formal attire for the mock interview...
n we actually thought that today is the day to submit our script...
but i do remember that she asked us to submit our script first b4 carry out the interview...
well...communication problems...
marks ll be deducted somemore...kesiannya...

anyway, i ll keep my mentally n physically strong no matter what happen...
although i ll be tension n stress sometimes...
cause i know somebody is supporting me...
so do i...^^

22092009

5 days left...
then i have to bec to upm again...
loads of assignments need me to do this week...
but i totally have no idea how to start it...
have to study for my 2nd test some more...
sigh...=/
can somebody give me helping hands??

19092009~sEoul gArd3n + bEacH

went to seoul garden last saturday with fern n her frens...

actually i not really like to eat steamboat..
cz i cant eat much...
so can say that it's a kind of waste lo..haha...xD
but since i din meet them for so long...
give them face la...hehe...(jk only le)

well..
let the pictures tell the stories..





chai ling, wei xi & ee wa


fern, me & chai ling
see...i was so concentrate...xD


wei xi, chai ling & ee wa




u guys sure have no idea what is this rite?
it is "cha koay tiao" which cooked by wei xi...xD
looked disgusting...but honestly the taste not bad..


teng teng...
this is the cook for the "cha koay tiao"
~wei xi~


we were so full after 3 hours eating there...
so...
we went to beach to have a walk...

~paradise beach~
photography session begins...





i miss the beach so so much neh..^^




fern & me =)


fern & me again

new born baby

i went to visit my xiao jiu's first baby this afternoon...

with my mum, sis and grandma...
of coz i was the driver...

a new born baby gal....
a little bit active...
kept staring at me when i hold her in my arms...
n her eyes not even blink at all..
so cute...^^

sshhh..see..
my little cousin sister is sleeping neh...Zzz

i really like babies and kids...
but it is only reserved for cute ones...haha....xD

20092009

去了外州读书
这个部落格好像颓废了
以前 常常上来这里的我
现在 却不怎么来了
理由很简单：懒了
这几个月里
的确发生了不少事
面对新的环境 我自问还可以适应
但是 在面对感情问题 我还是投降了

“我们都没错 只是不适合
我要的我现在才懂得
快乐是我的 不是你给的
寂寞要自己负责
我要的我现在才懂得
选择是我的 不是你给的
幸福要自己负责”

他曾闯进我的世界里
可我最后还是选择悄悄地离开了
我尝试了
也懂了
我们只是不适合
彼此都没有错
拥有过就好了

谢谢一路以来陪伴与支持我的朋友
最高境界的朋友~芳韵 敏宾
虽然分隔三地
一个东马 一个西马 另一个身在英国
我还是会想念你们的 =)
同科系的朋友
有你们在 我的大学生活变得更精彩
在未来的四年里要好好地对我哦

最重要的是
我发现
原来我还是很在乎
虽说我嘴里脑里心里老是想放下
可是原来我还是放不下
原来我还是那个荟茵
其实我一直都没变
很庆幸一切都安好

exam week!

1st test(13082009)~oral pronunciation
my very 1st test in upm
i got 8/10 marks...
have to thank my lovely dany who helped me the nite before i having my test..
thanks dany!
actually i can do better...
but be the 2nd higher in the class not so bad rite?haha..xD

2nd test(14082009)~human development
i spent quite some time on it...
studying alot on the details of fetal development...
in the end it came out a little bit...
so pity...
thank to jia jia who willing to spent his time to study together with me...
jia jia~u have to thank me neh...
ur xiao jie ll be proud of u...haha xD
cause u know all the single part of fetal development...
wanna form study group with him ad...
good buddy n coursemate!!

3rd test(16082009)~kenegaraan malaysia
i did not really study it...
n seniors said this subject is hard to score...
and the day b4 i still have PLUM duty...wth
but the questions still okay la...
still can do...^^

4th test(16082009)~titas
worst subject!
as u guys know, i hate those tamadun stuffs...
n i dun have enough time to study...=/
so.......aikz..
just used commonsense lo...

there were heavy rain after my titas test...
after bathing n took my dinner nasi pattaya
i slept for 4 hours after my test...lol..
i m so tired honestly...
luckily my energy is bec!!=)
have to start my next revison...
physiology n sosial demography...
gambatek~~

h1n1~balik kampung

because of H1N1
upm is closed for one week...lol....
i was bored listening they announced nonstop yesterday...
quite a large number of upm students suspected neh...
fever...flu...cough...all around the campus...
it is quite dangerous staying there actually...
i myself also suffered from those last few days...
now still coughing n flu...worried man!!

there are pro n con anyway...
pro~finally i can bec to my hometown....miss penang so much leh..
con~my sem break has been pull forward...aikz
which means this short break i cant go out so often...
cause...i have my very first test after i go bec to campus...=/
have to study!!sigh

to my dear course mates...college mates...uni mates n frens...
please take good care of urself as the H1N1 is getting more serious...
stay healthy n enjoy ur holidays...^^

29072009

finally...

i back to P3NaNG......=)

24072009

hey guys...sorry for not updating my blog le...
just make some simple updates today in case u all miss me...
especially my lao po...haha..xD
here i come...
28 days in upm...
i had gone through many many things here...lol...
new frens...new environment....syoknya...^^
for sure there ll be some stuffs that i hate it...
that is the orientation...lol
tiring orientation~
i joined my uni mtb too!!
mtb~malam budaya budaya..
it was memorable where i have to sing malay songs...haha
take a look guys....

is me...^^
looks like a malay rite??xD

3 singers..
zuzu, evy n me...

k6~ktdi (mtb members)

went to pku(pusat kesihatan universiti) on 21st july

beside me is anthony...
we syok sendiri only...haha

our college hari perpaduan is on this coming sunday...
and i need to sing malay song again....lol
the song is harder compared to previous time...
the first test is around the corner...
i hope i have enough time to do my revision...
i joined a lot of activities here...
including yoga n orchestra...haha
more pictures ll be updated...
that's all for today~
tata ^^

i can online ad!!!xD

finally...
i can online ad....
i m so so so happie!!!
have been waiting for so so long....
guys...stay connect v me ya....^^

2 days left!!

i m leaving very soon...
2 days left...damn fast...
i m still preparing.......lol....
n i finally get my offering letter....xD

22062009

few more days to go...
next week onwards i wont at penang ad...
lol...pretty fast...
the government really sucks...
how can we prepare and do everything in one week time?
everything is in a rush...-.-"
i have to shop for many things somemore..
wth la....really not enough time...

dad ll fetch me to upm with my cousin sister...
i need them to look after my belongings when i go for pendaftaran..
i need them to carry my things too...haha...xD
i m excited!i m happy!of course i she bu de here too!!
so much feelings mix together...lol...

upm..i m coming~~
yea~~^^

我受不了了!!

为什么世界上就是有这种人
死爱面子
难道说实话会让你觉得很难堪很羞耻吗?
我真的受不了了!!
对, 我是不该多管闲事
可是我真的接受不了
对人坦诚真的有这么难吗?
我该认了
是我没那本事
是我太天真了
你简直是我们女生的耻辱
原来
谎言是那么轻易被相信的
反而我所说的真话
却换来别人对我的质疑和不信任
我认了
我真的认了!!!

UPM~Bachelor Science

finally...
i can get into Uni which i hope for so long....
i got UPM-Bachelor Sains (Pembanguan Manusia dan Pengurusan)
my 4th choice...aikz...
anyone same course with me??
i dont have much comment on it..
just shun qi zi ran....
but i prefer statistics....
lack of luck...sigh.....=/

until now...
i couldnt find anyone same course with me...
my lao puo yunn got UPM Bachelor Muzik...
but she din want to take it already...
she will be going to uk...
our "zhong jian ren" piang will be going to segi too....
i bet i ll be miss them very much....

one week left...
many things have to do on this following week...
i have to stop all my jobs....
tuitions....clerk...teachers....
hopefully i can manage to settle everything...
dont get panic easily...(i will try,ok?)

i am nervous!!

woke up at 10.30 this morning...
coz the upu result ll b announced at 11am...
but when i opened the webpage just now...
i saw this...

Keputusan Permohonan Kemasukan Ke IPTA Lepasan STPM/Setaraf Sesi Akademik 2009/2010 - mulai 19 Jun 2009 12.00 tghri

it changed to 12pm le...
haiz...have to wait one more hour....
hopefully wont change the time again....
btw...i m nervous!!

19062009

那种感觉又回来了
我不会形容
很苦涩 很难熬
是我变了吗
以为用工作麻醉自己
不让自己有独自思考的时间
就能够暂时放下一切
原来不是的
我还是很脆弱
我很不开心
可是我又能够向谁诉说呢
毕竟想说也开不了口
很无奈 也很无助

i cant hold my tears anymore....

lonely night

insomnia again....

n i hate this so so much...

i still got to work tomorrow....

i want to sleep la!!

i wanna say " thank you" to you...
cause u willing to talk v me when i couldn't sleep...
anyway, take care ya...

tired..

i m tired actually...

try not to think about any relationship...

it's tiring...

somehow...

i need space...

and time...

i truly believe that

someone will get into my heart someday....

unfortunately...

it's not the right time now...

11062009

it's June now..damn fast...
UPU result ll be come out on 19th...
really hope that i can get what i want...
din blog for 1 week more...
i m lazy-ing...haha..
moreover...my streamyx sot sot dei ad...

too bad that i still have to work for this school holidays..
but it was more relaxing compared to school day..
sometimes brought those kids out..
also..v had more free time to talk n play..
we ate together...
told them stories...
played UNO with them...
it's fun!!
and my Patrick cut his hair...
OMG...like those guys in ns camp..=/

i finally had my hair straightened...
hope my hair grow longer n longer...^^

surprise??
i took it at centre's toilet...haha xD

i met my primary school teachers this Tuesaday..
when i went out eat v fern at Old Town...
Miss Teng n Miss Wong...
they cant recognize me until i said who m i..
they din change much...
we had a great time together...
talked n laughed a lot...
hope to see them again...^^

maybe u dunno what i m thinking...
but timing is very important...
u ll lose it when u din appreciate...

gOodbye uSm

obviously..i din get to go in USM...

well...i m okay with the result...

because i din put much hope on it too...

i will still wait for other uni...

congratulation to those who can enter USM...

lastly...

gOOd luck to me ya...=)

random photo shooting

these are the kids at my centre...
take a look! xD

the left hand side without spec wan is my "son" Keng Min...xD
he accidentally called me mummy that day...lol...
he is smart n brilliant...
but bad tempered sometimes...
the other one is Patrick.. chubby n has very fair skin...

hey...what u guys looking at?
the fatty boy who wears red shirt is Lakesh...
he is indian but chinese-educated...
honestly, i dun like him...(bad teacher) haha..
he is super slow n talkative..

naughty kids
the front wan is Ong Melven..
new student..

i actually took some pictures v them...
but quite blur...
because the camera girl shaking her hand everytime..
forgive her...she is just a kid...=)

我 需要

12th lonely night...
with my lonely heart...

现在的我很需要依靠

一个温暖的肩膀

一句慰问的话

一个有安全感的拥抱

究竟什么时候开始

我突然渴望这一切

我心里其实很孤单

你知道吗?

24052009

10th lonely night...
with my lonely heart...

back to last sunday...
as usual..
i dropped my brother at sg.nibong...
then i went to work at pisa...

honestly...
8.5 hours sitting there alone...
i really dunno how to pass if i din bring my laptop together..
with my laptop,
at least i spent my time on watching...
to avoid thinking something n somebody...
sigh...

in the late afternoon,
i met mr.sim...
he was having his class for upper6
well...he din change much...
still so charming with his smiling...xD
of course i greeted him
but he was busy talking on the phone at that moment..
i miss him...lol....
including his teaching n his jokes sometimes...=)
for me...
he is a "hao hao xian sheng" in my eyes...
good tempered...patient...
without any doubt,
he is a good teacher...
unfortunately..
i m not a good student....xD
i din score well for my chemistry paper..
i did put some effort on my organic chem...
but i still got C+
sigh...

anyway...
i wanna to thank him so much...
because he was willing to help me...
even sms me explained to me about the solutions...


THANK YOU SIR!
hope u stay healthy n happy all the time...=)

消失

我

突然间想消失在这个世界

究竟多少人会紧张我

究竟我活着的意义是什么

过生活吗

我想

我又疯了

please stop comparing!!

9th lonely night...
with my lonely heart...

not much to write for this post...
by the way
i m quite down now...
i slept for three hours after i came home...
i supposed to be happy....
unfortunately...
i started emo-ing because of one message..
i hate people comparing...
u should know that...
especially on me...
no matter who is that person compared with..

i dunno why u told me all these..
i m not interested by the way...
everything bout them is none of my business...
i dun wanna to know...
i dun wanna to care too...

i m hy...
the only species with the only DNA structures...
no more second hy in this world...
i wanna to be myself...
n not to follow people's shadow...
do u know that?

please...
dun compare me with others...
i do agree what piang said...
it will make us to hate that person slowly...

my first time(continued)

see..this is my receipt for the paid summons


again..
this is my first time...
i finally paid my summons...lol
i went to the police station just now...
of course nt me this "lu chi" went by myself..haha xD
when i reach there..
there were alot of people queue up to pay summons...
n it was very hot..

again..
i made some funny stuffs...
actually i followed what yunn told me...
she asked me to ask the police see whether can cancel or not

"encik, bolehkah saya potong saman ini?"
"potong? guna gunting kah?"
"err...tak...i want to cancel this summon."
"eh, macam mana boleh cancel pulak?"
"i tak tau i salah apa pun."
"salah parking."
"ooh, tak boleh punya ar...tak apa lah.."
"kena bayar berapa?"
"RM70"
"ooh...okay...thank you"

by da way
i have to pay RM30 only...phew
saved RM40
i dun wan kena summons anymore...
hope this is the last time..haha...

and i wanna to thank the one who be my driver...
cause need to wake up earlier...
thank you!

lonely night

5th lonely night
with my lonely heart....

how are you?

this is the only thing i can say...
i dunno what to say...
dunno what to ask...
n i dunno what to feel.....
perhaps my brain is blank now...

i really hope that everything ll b bec to normal...
but it seems like impossible
perhaps da situation can be changed?
i have no idea at all....
i lose my confidence....
n my feelings too.........

舍不得

第一次你陪我坐着
我的手心是空空的
我知道那些简讯声你努力藏著
还怕我难过
不追问到底为什么
是我最后的温柔
想笑着附和说分开是好的
但我们却怎么一起哭了
我舍不得
可是时间回不去了
爱你很值得
只是该停了
没有我你要好好的
我舍不得
最后一次抱紧你了
我们错过的
错了就错了
不用担心我
我不爱你了

至少你记忆里的我是微笑的
亲爱的 有你牵著我的那些日子
真的好快乐

我舍不得
可是时间回不去了
爱你很值得
没有我你要好好的
我舍不得
最后一次抱紧你了
我们错过的
错了就错了
不用担心我
我..走..了..



我反复听着这首歌好多次
强烈的感觉一直涌上我心头
我想说
我是真的舍不得......

第一次

哎哟

我的第一次就这样结束了

我也糊里糊涂 懵懵懂懂的

就酱失去了我的“第一次”

唉 =/

警察先生 为什么你不给我个机会呢??

我只不过到广场去办点事

况且那里也有很多车停泊着啊...

你就开了张罚单给我

真无情耶 T.T

女头家~高曼华

“女头家” 这部本地戏剧终于也都播完了
这部戏真的很有意思
播放期间
我们整家人都看得“津津有味”的

而我 也很幸运的
遇到了饰演高家大女儿~高曼华
她就是mandy陈诗莹
mandy是从台湾来马来西亚发展的艺人
遇到她的那天 她很亲切
还跟我们一起合照
原来她是在拍戏空档当她男朋友的助理
当时我还以为我认错人了
隔天 我还特地买了个小皮萨給她
她的脸都红了 哈哈 xD

18052009

一段感情究竟是用什么来衡量的？
亲情 爱情 甚至友情
为什么它们有时候就会变得很渺小？
我真的很好奇
为什么感情总是得来不易
然而它却在一瞬间从你指尖悄悄地溜走
这世上真的会有真爱吗？

幸运之神会眷顾我吗？
我的梦想会成真吗？
而我想要的有可以得到吗？
上天究竟赐給了我什么天赋
怎么我又开始觉得我一无是处
还是说我不知足？

幸福的家？
真挚的友情？
还是人人眷恋的爱情？
我不懂
真的不懂

很多时候
很多事情都由不得我去选择
倘若有的选择
我不会选择过酱的生活
偏偏
我却无从选择
这就是我的fate

我又开始“陷入低潮”了
我又开始胡思乱想了
我 又 疯 了
天使和恶魔再次缠着我
我又什么时候才可以逃脱呢？

我不是一直都想要靠自己吗？
我不是一直都想要幸福快乐吗？
我不是一直都想要证明自己不是一无是处吗？

很烦耶
我 还有能力去承担吗？

1st post of may

今年的第五个月又过了一半
我也不懂病了几回
我也很久没上来这里了

又被病魔缠身了
很累 很辛苦
那讨人厌的鼻涕和痰
把我折磨得死去活来
我好讨厌生病
真希望赶快好起来

生活上

除了工作 还是工作
抱病工作 真的很辛苦
我真的很怀念上课的生活
很想念 很想念

面对那些小孩子
我除了无言 还是无言
加上生病
根本没有多余的力气管教他们
想对他们说：你们好自为之吧


祝我：
早日康复
永远快乐

specially for you

i ll wait

until the day

hope it wont be too late

remember

i ll keep all my promises

and hold my words

hold your tears please

cause i dun wanna to see you cry

you are the one i appreciated lots

my shoulder is always for u

whenever u feel sad or tension

dun ever forget

u still got me....=)

hug momo when i din beside u
i ll hug dai dai too
nitez

我的期待

很失望

我还是没有收到你的任何简讯

你真的决定了

还是 你只想静一静

或者是 你在等着我的答复

我错过了

对不起 真的对不起

我真的希望 也很期待

一觉醒来 可以看到你的简讯

知道你还是关心着我的......

i m waiting....
just wait for ur one msg...

i miss u lots....
i really do....

28042009

睡了一觉 心情确实平复了许多
只有睡觉 才能让我暂时放下一切
原来我是带着泪水睡着的
难怪醒来后眼睛有点肿

发怒果然会让人失去理智
很庆幸我睡着了
要不我不懂我又会怎么样了
原来我还没忘掉那不开心的回忆
事情都过了一年多
我只向一个人提起过
当时我只想找人发泄 了解一下我的心情
因为我一个人真的承受不了那么多

每每想起
我的眼泪还是禁不住流出来
我还是很难过
为什么我无法释怀
为什么我不能当一切都没发生过
为什么???

HATE!!!!

I HATE EVERYTHING IN THIS WORLD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I HATE STAYING HERE!!!!!!!!!

I WANNA LEAVE HERE!!!!!!!!!

WHY WANNA MAKE ME CRY???????????

WHY WANNA BULLY ME?????????

WHY????????WHY?????????

i need exercise!!

i really have to on diet this time...
not only on diet...but exercise too!!

i went sunshine yesterday..
and i had made a body fat screening...
it cost me RM3..
quite worth la...
first...i filled up my personal data..
then the people in charged took me to do measurement..
i stepped up n stood on the machine...
then pull one part of it....(lol...dunno how to explain)
the digits of my body weight appeared in few seconds....
oh oh...OMG....
i gained my weight!!!
it is XXkg now!!!wth!!

after that,the people who in charged explained to me...
lol...my bio-age is 23 years old...
it is older than my actual age..=.=
another things which shocked me alot was:
my body fat considered as slightly high...
oh oh...30.4% of my actual weight...lol...=.=
the ppl asked me to some exercise to reduce my body fat...
build those fats into muscles...lol..

just wanna share something here...
*loss weight doesnt mean loss fat
*weight = bone + water + muscle + fat
*skeletal muscle decreases = metabolic rate decreases
*slim down = reduce body fat, build muscle n increase metabolism

thus...i really have to do more exercise...
to reduce my body fat..
and build skeletal muscle...lol...=.=
hope i can carry out my plan this time...xD

27042009

忙碌的日子又开始了
刚从jonathan家回来
他妈妈还请我吃巧克力布丁
刚吃完饭 想上来这里留些字.....

昨晚九点钟就上床睡了
身体累 心也累
我很少有把手机关掉的习惯
可是 我昨晚关机了
睡着睡着
不懂什么时候我醒了过来
看看时钟
原来才十二点多
想起我那关机的电话
爬起来摸索然后打开它
有个简讯 也是唯一的简讯
来不及了 太迟了
我真的很累 我已经没有多余的力气
我还是睡着了....

今早醒来
我再也没有收到任何简讯
我应该明白了 也应该懂了...

你决定了吗?
你真的决定了吗???

nitez

i m down now...emo-ing...

i wanna go to sleep ad...

hope i ll be okay after sleep...

promise myself n yourself...

no tears anymore...

only with dai dai n momo...

nitez..

笨?单纯?

我觉得自己很矛盾
也很可笑
相信人与否就只在一线之间
对于信任的人
我往往給予100%的信任
我曾说过
我的信任不会随随便便就把送人
可惜
有时候的我还是很天真
很容易上当
是该说我笨呢 还是单纯
选择前者就太侮辱我的智商了吧
还是选择后者吧 哈哈^^
是我没好好好认识人类邪恶的一面
还是说 在感情上我的自我保护意识较强
who knows?

无聊之作

有时候会问自己：人的命运是自己掌控的吗
偶尔我会质疑这句话的真实性
为什么有些人就能过着“饭来张口，衣来伸手”的生活
而有些人劳累了大半辈子
却只剩下疲惫的身躯和憔悴的容貌
人不是应该平等的吗
可是同样是人类的我们却有着不同的命运
有些人注定一生可以享受荣华富贵
有些人却一生拼命挣钱过生活

对我来说
如果那个人是白手起家
我会对他敬佩不已
不过如果是靠着家族的财富
我只可以说他命好

出来工作也有段时间了
我确实体会了很多
虽然没有职场政治
也没有职场风波
不过些许的压力是有的
钱 真的不容易赚
都是用劳力与精神换来的

有个朋友问：你很缺钱吗?干嘛打酱多份工?
问这问题的朋友
和明显的和我不是同道中人
我也懒得解释些什么
同人不同命
试问从小娇生惯养的人
备受溺爱的人
可以了解吗

我并非似钱如命
我只想靠我的双手赚钱
靠我双手养活自己
都快踏入第二十个年头了
难道还靠父母吗?
我还是喜欢靠自己

钱
虽然不是万能的
可是它常常使得鬼推磨
如果这世上的每一样东西不是靠金钱来衡量
那该有多好
然而
这只是我异想天开的想法
有些人为了钱出卖感情
甚至出卖肉体
钱啊
终究让人变得更邪恶

insomnia

insomnia.....

i hate this...
couldnt sleep...

and now...
i need somebody to talk v me so badly....
i need somebody to care me so badly....
i need somebody to sayang me so badly....
lol
emo now....T.T

装傻

常常我就会装傻
为的就是逃避问题
我不懂我这样做对不对
我只想保留美好的一面
好让大家可以下台

看了她的部落格
我其实不懂要给些什么反应
就当着若无其事
就在装傻
这样 究竟对吗
我不懂
真的不懂

她也没向我说些什么
希望她在她的世界可以活得更快乐 更幸福
我承认
我也会有心软的时候
可是 这样好吗?

mY nEw laptOp

finally i have time on here...
n i m blogging using my new laptop...^^
hp pavilion...
i done lots of survey...
asked my fren who work as technician..
surfed da websites...
i even went to pc fair twice...
when i considered hp pavilion
i was a little bit worried..
because da screen only 12"
and i actually felt that quite small...
by da way...it is light n fulfill most of my conditions...
except da screen...
at last...i made my decision..
my dad asked his fren to reserve one for me..
now..
i m already get used of da screen..
it is actually not too bad..
n i can bring it to anywhere...
hmm...great!!xD

下雨天

在雨天听这首歌超有感觉的....

下雨天了怎么办 我好想你
不敢打给你 我找不到原因
为什么失眠的声音
变得好熟悉
沉默的场景 做你的待定
陪我等雨停
期待让人越来越沉溺
谁和我一样
等不到他的谁
爱上你我总在学会
寂寞的滋味
一个人撑伞 一个人擦泪
一个人好累
怎样的雨 怎样的夜
怎样的我能让你更想念
雨要多大
天要多黑 才能够有你的体贴
其实没有我你分不出那些差别
结局还能多明显
别说你会难过
别说你想改变
被爱的人不用道歉
寂寞让人越来越疲惫
谁和我一样
等不到他的谁
爱上你我总在学会
寂寞的滋味
一个人撑伞 一个人擦泪
一个人好累
怎样的雨 怎样的夜
怎样的我能让你更想念
雨要多大
天要多黑 才能够有你的体贴
其实没有我你分不出那些差别
结局还能多明显
别说你会难过
别说你想改变
被爱的人不用道歉
怎样的雨 怎样的夜
怎样的我能让你更想念
雨要多大
天要多黑 才能够有你的体贴
其实没有我你分不出那些差别
结局还能多明显
别说你会难过
别说你想改变
被爱的人不用道歉

her homemade sushi^^

this evening i actually had my English class...
but at last i decided to accompany her to library...
know what??
she said wanna treat me eat sushi..
haha...xD
i was so excited...xD
as a result, i canceled my class...
phoned her n confirmed v her again...
then went to fetch her immediately...
waiting for my sushi so badly...^^

in car...i asked her again...
below is our conversation...(in mandarin)
me: eh,u really wanna treat me eat sushi ar?
her: yala...i kena lottery mer...got money ad...
me: really eh ma? how come kena lottery?so good?
her: hmm...dun care where i get da money la...treat u eat toh tiok liao...
me: ok ok...so v going qb har？
her: hmm...

i was actually very hungry...
so i was happy to hear that...
then i took another road to qb to avoid traffic jam..
suddenly....guess..what's happened?
she took out a small, white tupperwear...
lol...homemade sushi...cheh...
thought going sushi king...
okay lo...let me took so long long way but not going to qb..
i was disappointed...=/
n pretended angry...haha...
her homemade sushi was delicious perhaps...
i ate all in car...lol...
tam chiak lo me...xD
as a punishment to her..
i asked her to send me sushi next time...^^

miss ur sushi so much...
even u...
it is raining now...
hope u cover ur blanket
n dun get cold ya..^^

给你的话

你告诉我
有人取代了你在我心目中的地位
我变得愈来愈不懂你的感受
不晓得你要些什么
你说 你再也容不进我的世界
我开始变得很陌生

我想让你知道
一直以来 你在我心目中的份量我比谁都懂
或许你开始迷惑了
你也失去你原本拥有的信心
有时候我是真的不懂你要些什么
我承认 我也很固执

想想
好久好久没和你好好说话了
我很enjoy和你互聊心事的时候
我们无所不谈
我有时候是迟钝了些
不懂得你要表达些什么
我也不是要把我的世界给封闭起来
我也希望得到关怀

你说过
假如一天你迷失了自己
你希望我把你带回来
牵着你一起走下去
我从来都没有忘记你说的
即使你曾经是怎么迷失了自己
我不是原谅了你
把你给带回来吗?

刚刚
以往的回忆又浮现在我脑海里
曾经是多么熟悉的地方
我再次踏入
给了我很多了感触
我发现
我还是很珍惜...

你曾说过
就算朋友再多 也无法了解你心里的寂寞
你说我是最了解你的那一位
我想问
现在还是吗?

trust me
although the life is tough and challenging
i will never forget what i have promise you
hope you sleep well tonight
may God bless you...
take care & hugs...^^

19042009

我病了
而且是患上感冒和伤风
讨厌 =/

昨天
我遇到了个野蛮人
他是pcfair的security
当时我正在值班
看见他捄这一位学生的衣服
还直骂那学生bodoh
我都傻了眼
至于发生什么事
我也懒得写了
只觉得
怎么会有酱蛮不讲理的人

是你没把你的本份做好
还来怪人
你有没有问题
我和他吵了起来

you are the one who should be responsible...
not us...
the outsiders come in through here not my business..
i m just a clerk here..
how come you ask me do your job...
you should block those outsiders come in from here...
not me...
i m not security guard...
but is you!!
and you should not scold the boy...
he dunno anything...

现在想起
我还是会气
很无奈
那时候他还想出手打那位学生
最后我把bk keng 给叫了出来
连bk keng 这位好好老师都忍不住发火

怎么这世上就有酱蛮横的人呢
唉.....

18042009

guess...why m i still awake?lol...
not insomia...
but just woke up from sleep...xD
damn tired whole day....
thought saturday i would have more free time...
but nope!!
i went for munsyi test at usm this morning...
n i nearly late..v chee hong..
because he took da wrong way at first...haha
310 question in one hour...
it's just like omg....
my hand keep working n working...

afternoon...
i had my tuition class for jonathan n chee ying...
until 6.30pm...half day passed...phew..
after that..i attended a birthday party for my neighbour's baby...
hmm...he is cute by da way....^^
the conclusion for this party was:i gain my weight again!!!=/
due to the tiredness...i broke my record....haha
i went sleep at 9pm...wow....unbelievable rite?

and i got a news which disappointed me alot in da late afternoon..
penang prefects' footdrill competition 2009...
peng hwa got 4th for basic..3rd for formation....
i really wondered why they got such result...
mayb i shouldnt say much...
but i had participate this competition before...
we put much effort on it...
n...we got 1st n 2nd for basic...
1st for formation n overall champion...
seniors keep maintain da trophy...
but u all lost it...really disappointed le...
from joining prefects board until last year...
i actually felt that our marching is da best....
i proud of our prefects' marching...
but now...i change my mind....
it's not da best anymore...
it replaced by chungling,union n etc...
speechless....=/

i m dilemma-ing by da way...
going to buy laptop soon...
but having difficulties choosing a good laptop
lol...pc fair ll b finish 2ml...
i still cant make a decision yet...
hp?toshiba?asus?
i need help!!!

i missed my modeling audition today...=/
i will b participating next season...
trust me..i ll go for it...=)

发泄

今晚又处于“不正常”的状态 =/
怎么最近的我酱反常?

拜托一下好不好
既然事情都已经发生了
都已经是事实了
还能弥补些什么呢
我最多也只上一次当
难不成还会被同样的事情被骗第二次吗
就当我买个教训
怎么就是有诸多意见

够了
真的够了
我也受够了

我只想拥有一天的好心情
有酱困难吗

怀念我的笑容
最近都被偷走了
我不想变个冷漠无情的人

饶了我，好吗?

seriously

i m missing you right now
do you know
i guess u dont know

终于....

终于
我的心情平复了
有时候我的脾气很怪 也很坏
不是很多人都忍受得了
就连我自己有时候也受不了

他曾说
他可以忍受
是酱的吗?

还好
我又变回正常了 =)

发牢骚

又上来这里发牢骚了
这不能全都怪我
有些事情和人把我给惹了
况且这是我的部落格
我爱写什么 爱埋怨什么
都不干任何人的事
我只是想抒发我的情绪而已

人 往往心中都藏着些不满吧
说出来 可能会伤了和气
不说 自己又没办法承受
很矛盾对吧
这世上有太多矛盾的事情了
数都数不清
常觉得这世界欠缺公平
为什么人往往会受到不公平的待遇
还是我太悲观了呢?

有时候你会被假象包围着
而你身在其中
却什么也感受不到
对于那些美丽的谎言
你又怎么看待呢?

我讨厌受到不公平的对待
也不喜欢别人对我的所作所为有任何意见
更不喜欢受到任何束缚
我不说
不表示我认同
我不是我行我素
只是我有自己的立场
只要我认为是对的
我都会去做
有时候的我是固执的
我不否认

我是我
在这世上独一无二的我
我想做些什么是我的自由
只要我没触犯任何法律就好啦
我知道我的生活该怎么过
我若错了 我会改
我不需要任何质疑的眼光

should i give it a try??

should i give it a try??

i m still thinking....

i need some time to think about it...

actually i dont have much confidence...

seriously..i m thinking now....


18 of april...

should i go?

modeling contest at gurney plaza

02042009

nothing special today...
but still wanna write something here...

i m bored perhaps....
can anyone just talk to me??lolx...

life passes everyday...
and yet...
my life seems like meaningless...
just full of working...
working working n working...
n i m tired...

suddenly miss my school life so much....
my beloved frens...teachers...
and also U6SE!!!
but surely not peng hwa n three of them....lolx...
i wish the time could flow backwards...

i miss my school life lots!!!

midnight post

April Fool finally passed...

Looking backwards...
when we were small...
we tried to fool each other on this day...
so..same for the kids nowadays...
I got fooled by them!!lolx..
hmmpp...those gals really naughty...xD

again...with my 'sexy' voice....
scolded them nonstop....
peace for few seconds....
then bec to normal again...lolx..
n with their very 'nice' writting..
i suffered one more time....T.T

finally...
i got my march payment...
aikz....damn little...
no allowance...T.T
cause i din work for full month...

i went cheng beng at sg petani this morning...
with my dad...only two of us...
the weather damn hot...
sweat trickled down all the time..
n now my skin become darker ad...

n now...
somebody is waiting i finish blogging...
i wonder y he so interested to my blog...lolx...
he said he wanna read my mind..hehe
hey man...
u thought u can simply catch what i m thinking...haha
if u can do it...then i m not hy ad..lolx...

p/s: just kidding...dun take it serious k?

that's the ending for this post...
wanna sleep with dai dai ad...
nitez again everyone...^^

010409~April Fool

WOW...unbelievable...
i m still awake...xD
thought i ll be sleep all night long...

later have to follow my dad go 'cheng beng' somemore..
at sungai petani...so far..lol...
i just slept for 2 hours after i came bec from work...
and now...i m energetic..hahax..

it was a tiring day...
those kids really make me frustrated...T.T
i wonder why they cant listen to me...
have to cane them somemore....lol...
and i was getting moody once i felt sleepy...
my sisters already get used to my weird temper..
they wont b kacauing me while i m in bad mood...lol...
cause i ll b scolding them like a mad person..

unfortunately...i din get my salary yet..
i want to go for shopping so badly...=)

01 April~April Fool
hope that i wont b fooled by those kids...
or else....they ll be kena la...hahaha..
i wont let them bully me so easily...lolx...
Patrick...dun try to trick me ya..^^

hmm...that's all for this post...
wanna go to bed d...
nitez everyone...

tired n sleepy

just wanna drop some words here...

aikz...damn sleepy today..
dun wanna to go work le....=/
but today is my payday...
what can i do??lol...
keep fishing while teaching Jonathan just now...
i m so so tired...not enough sleep...haiz

i want to sleep le!!!

voiceless

i really dunno what happen to my voice recently...
it started few weeks ago...

voiceless...

cant even talk nicely...
and cant sing!!
just now went redbox somemore
OMG....it was a terrible singing!!
i hate that....=/

i think all of these caused by those naughty kids...
shouted them so often..sigh..=(
my lovely kids....dun let me shout so often okay?

God...
please let my voice come back to me..........

长眠

2009年03月5日
阿嫲长眠了
当时一切对我们来说实在是太突然了
现在想起 我的眼泪还是会情不自禁地流下来
虽然她有病在身 是绝症
但是我们却没有预料到她就酱离开了我们
而且就连她什么时候断气也不晓得
她离开这世界的时候 也没有人发现
这真的是种遗憾

我其实真的很遗憾
过去她生病时没常常去看她
从去年的5月1日直至今年的除夕
我才回阿嫲家
后来她转来槟城医院
我去过一次
而那次 竟是我和她说话的最后一次

2009年3月1日
还好那天我去了
要不 我肯定后悔一辈子
那天下班回来真的很累 要不是需要载我妈妈他们
我可能就不去了

那天 我看到了她被病魔缠身那痛苦的模样
我尝试和她说话 希望可让她忘掉她的痛楚
看见她哭 我的心真的很酸

2009年3月5日~星期四~6时多
我在下班回来的路途中接到家里的电话
妹妹说 阿嫲离开了
而当时的我在十字路口
那一瞬间 我傻了
很多画面一下子浮现在我脑海中
到家后 我们一直等爸爸回来
我也请了假
因为要过北海去了
爸爸回来后 看见他眼眶红红的
他也很难过吧

路途中 我哭了
想起了阿嫲来我家住的时候
想起了阿嫲和我聊天的时候
想起了阿嫲做糕的时候
想起了阿嫲的很多很多
我哭了......

偏偏那该死的司机不识路
带着阿嫲游车行
阿嫲的灵体迟迟不回家
把我们給急死了
回到了阿嫲家
看见叔叔伯伯姑姑他们围在阿嫲身旁
所有人都哭了
我看到阿嫲的那一刻
我也哭了
我还记得帮阿嫲穿寿衣的那情景
甚至还为她化妆
她那冷冰冰的身躯
那冰冷的感觉 把我的心也刺痛了

接着几天都是那些仪式
然后忙着折那些金银纸
这是我那时候唯一能做的事
我不时会去看看阿嫲的灵体 和她说说话
看见她那安详睡去的模样 我心里好过一些
我想 对她来说是一种解脱吧

阿嫲过世的第二天
还发生了一些事
我的堂弟在熟睡中突然发羊痫风
我爸发现他那时候
他已全身僵硬 口吐白沫
我妹妹出来喊救兵时 真的把我们给吓坏了
因为他没醒过来 我们拼命喊他的名字
可是他却没有知觉
我们害怕他会酱走了
目睹那一切的妹妹也吓坏了 一直哭个不停

阿嫲保佑
他最后醒了过来
我爸他们载他去看医师 还有法师
法师说他冲撞到"不干净的东西"
还好他现在没事了
我们也松了一口气
而我的电话也因为我的疏忽烧给了阿嫲
很意外吧
这真的是一个意外

阿嫲出殡那天
原本心情平复了
谁晓得 我终究还是哭了
尽管太阳多么晒
我的眼泪还是拼命地流
阿嫲真的离开了
她和阿公葬在一块儿

以前 我们常常会问爸爸
有回阿嫲家吗
现在 阿嫲不在了
大家都会很不习惯
尤其是和阿嫲一起住的 更是不习惯
我阿嫲 虽然念的书不多
可是她的厨艺很好
她 最爱就是看台湾电视剧
就那些说闽南话的

阿嫲
你安息吧
我会牢记你所说的
还有
我会想你的~

工作

在centre當安親班老師也有一個多月了
起初 我是incharge四年級的學生
可是后來 我被調了
因為那班學生真的很難搞 有幾個常常會讓我吐血(夸張式修辭啦)

就比如那個洪志良 Hong Kee Leong
他就是個問題學生 時常出口成髒
字体呢 是我最头痛的一个
因为我根本看不懂他写些什么
要他重新写过 他却发脾气 甚至还哭了
實在受不了
有時候他們的功課很多 我要教他們做功課 又要做homework checking
我哪來的三頭六臂啊 所以時常弄得我緊張兮兮的

現在的我 調去二年級的班
嗯 感覺還不錯
不過呢 最怕他們寫華文字
因為 他們的字體實在很恐怖(我不是說笑的)
常常要叫他們從新寫過
唉.....T.T

不過當中也有可愛的 胖胖的 kpc的 乖巧的 smart的 難搞的
Patrick Lai 賴澤和～還蠻疼他的
因為他樣子精靈又可愛
尤其是他笑起來又少了兩顆門牙的樣子
常常會讓我忍不住bully他
雖然常常忘記帶功課 可是他卻一點也不偷懶
即使是很難很難的題目 他也會盡全力作答
你說 我能不疼他嗎 哈哈

在那里工作真的會有不一樣的體驗
偶爾會被氣 不過那也是在所難免的
可是看到那些可愛的小孩子 心情有時候也會變好 很神奇吧
雖然都是別人的孩子 可是還是會有感情的不是嗎

我呢 希望可以體驗不同的工作
所謂行行出狀元嘛
之前曾做promoter token seller 到現在的老師
雖然都只是兼職 不過仍然可以學到不少東西

不懂centre的小孩子 覺得我是怎樣的一位老師呢
兇的? 和藹的?
這些我就不懂咯 呵呵
哪天如果我知道了 我一定會再上來這里!!

...speechless...

......
speechless

although the title is 'speechless'
but i still have lots of things to say......

這陣子很煩 以為倒頭大睡后就會沒事
結果一覺醒來 問題還是存在的
心里有好多話想說 可是沒有對的人可以分擔
所有的煩惱還是得往肚子里吞

不懂你有沒有過心痛的感覺
我體會過了 而且不止一次
常常看愛情文藝片就會有醬的情形
真正的心痛 是難以形容的
眼淚也隨著那痛楚不受控制地流出來
即使你拼命擦拭也沒有用

在世界某個角落的你 愿意和我分享嗎


喜歡 是淡淡的愛 愛 是深深的喜歡

我喜歡單純的愛
可是要經營一段感情真的很不容易
除了要互相包容 真心 還要用心
愛情 真的是一項很難修的科目
可是只要愛上了 就無法自拔
不過 我相信時間可以淡化一切
唯有時間 才是愛情最好的解藥

等待～waiting

等待 的確是件很煎熬的事
在我們的生命中
往往有我們要等待的人 或是事情
我對waiting這首韓語歌情有獨鐘 BOA主唱
聽了很多次都不覺得膩


等待著一個你很愛很愛的人 他也許還愛著你 也許不
等待著一個已經不愛你的人 你很愛他 但他視你而不見
兩者都很煎熬
有人說 被愛是幸福的
有的人卻說 愛人是幸福的
可是對我來說 愛情不是單程機票
它 是需要兩方面的付出
只有這樣 戀情才會開花結果 才會維持得更長更久
醬也才算得上是幸福
不需要每天都黏在一起
只要心里有對方 那就已經足夠了
但是 只要一方退縮了 不管另一方怎么努力也無濟于事


等待一個你愛的人 沒有所謂值不值得
只要是深愛著對方 一切都是心甘情愿的
我認為那份感覺是難以磨滅的
我很重感情 也很重感覺
感覺對了就對了


分分離離 離離合合
不要為了想要一起而勉強在一起
雖然和好了 但是問題還確確實實的存在著
這樣就會模糊當初在一起那種最單純的快樂


和我在一起 最大的恐懼莫過于我的忽冷忽熱
沒有多少人可以忍受
可是我愿意等待
等待那天的到來
你懂嗎?

夜里的感觸

我算得上是個夜貓族
常常半夜三更都不睡覺
醬的生活形式我也都習慣了
可是 最近的精神狀況都很不好
很累 很困 臉色也不好
我知道醬會影響健康
可是還是擺脫不了遲睡的習慣

我 害怕寂靜夜晚
特別是一個人的時候
腦子里老愛想些有的沒的 感觸也特別多
之前有個他陪著我聊天 現在沒了
又恢復原有的狀況

想發泄 又找不到合適的人
只好上來這里抒發一下情緒
畢業后 很多事情都變得不一樣
忙著打工 忙這忙那
連和朋友出來聚聚的時間也沒有
整天就好像只有工作 我也麻木了

你說我變了 我不懂
或許真的有吧
相處的時間變少 之間的溝通也少了
可是并沒有改變我對你的思念和疼愛
你知道嗎
我最喜歡我們分享心事的時候
因為 我只對你一個人說
也只有你知道我需要怎么樣的安慰
我喜歡我們有說有笑的時候
一起大吃大喝 一起鬧

現在的你睡著了
而我 還在這里對著熒幕打字
還記得我說過嗎
有你的teddy 我睡得特別安心 哈～


晚安!

玫瑰～洋桔梗

玫瑰

在情人節的季節里意義重大
前陣子報章介紹洋桔梗
洋桔梗～我想她對大多數人來說還蠻陌生的
其實她和玫瑰長得挺相似的 顏色也很多



粉紅色的洋桔梗



藍色的



長在海邊的


桔梗花代表真誠的愛
如果是紅色的
那就代表著真誠而永不改變的愛
只要付出得夠多
花或者愛情都可能變成你所期望的


昨夜
一朵玫瑰很不幸的被扔掉了
她被遺棄了
因為她無法完成主人的使命
結果逃不過被遺棄的宿命


還記得去年的情人節
那天剛好有chemistry補習
我 piang 和 yunn 還搞了個情人節套餐
至于吃些什么 我也不大記得了
好像有mushroom什么的
今年的情人節
我們并沒有聚在一塊兒
各有各的忙 各有各的節目吧
而我呢
很平凡的過了一天
不知道情人節的你快樂嗎？

14022009

今天一早就起床了
因為呢 要去Jonathan那里教補習
在那里 時間總是過得很快
他沒有我想象中壞 成績也不錯
教了他一個禮拜
他也蠻乖的 只是偶爾會對我說笑

不過呢
下個星期起
我就得天天到他家去
因為他快考試了
他媽媽要我替他溫習功課

學費一個月RM350
這份工作也算不錯了
不像centre那里
常常會被那些小鬼氣的我說不出話來
工作有不少

原本以為今天他們補課
centre應該會開
所以特地早些到centre
哪里知道今天off day
哈哈
我也真是的 沒問清楚
結果白跑一趟

09年的情人節
不懂大家會怎么過呢
有人說要送我玫瑰
我是不好意思收下啦 想拒絕他
他又不是我的男朋友 收下的話好像有點奇怪耶
所以希望他明白咯

對愛情 我有我自己的一份執著
我相信一見鐘情 也相信相愛的人可以征服一切
愿天下的有情人終成眷屬

祝大家情人節快樂!!

給一位朋友的话

不懂你会不会上来看
可能哪天你上来了 看到了
我希望你可以明白我的心意.....

对不起
除了这句话 我不懂该说什么
其实我真的不懂得该如何反应
你那天贸贸然向我表白
一下子反应不过来
到现在还一直逃避你

可能你也察觉到了吧
前阵子我们无话不说 现在就犹如一百八十度的转变
可能这是我的心理病吧
对异性的追求还是心有余悸
也许对之前的恋情都无法开花结果的缘故吧

我其实很向往像童话故事般的爱情
希望所有的结局都是圆满的
可是现实中的爱情可不一样
爱情应该是两情相愿 也应该是理智的
我在之前的每段恋情都不是闹着玩的
我是付出真心 全心全意投入
可能他们受不了我的忽冷忽热
可是没法子
我还是无法改变我的性格
虽然之前的恋情都无法开花结果
可是我相信射手座的我
始终会找到我生命中的Mr.Right

我一直都把你当朋友看待
我知道你人很好
也知道你喜欢我很久了
可是我认为现在的我们还没到那种程度
所以给了negative的答复
可是我希望你可以继续找寻另一个目标
加油咯!!